[137] When We Grew Up

Rationally speaking, everyone understood the advantages of Shen Mo transferring to the No. 1 High School in the city. But they had watched her grow up beside them from childhood, and now that she was truly going to leave, no one—from Shen Baoguo and Peng Shuyu to Cheng Mengfei, who had spent comparatively less time with her—was willing to let her go.

Still, this was Shen Chengli’s family matter. In the end, the decision had to be made by him and Shu Mei.

At noon, Shen Chengli and Shu Mei discussed the matter again. In the end, they followed Shen Chengli’s earlier proposal: Shen Mo would finish her first year of junior high at the town’s No. 2 Middle School, then transfer to the city’s No. 1 High School after the summer vacation. This would also give the couple half a year to devote more energy to handling the transition involved in moving the company headquarters and establishing the new company.

Although Shen Mo did not want to transfer schools, she understood in her heart that her parents’ arrangement was for her own good. She had always been obedient and sensible, and seeing that her parents had taken a step back, she agreed.

Once she accepted that transferring schools was an unchangeable fact, the girl began to grow excited over her “achievement” in the matter. Although she had not changed the final outcome, she had won herself an entire semester. That could certainly be considered a victory for the time being.

It filled her with a proud sense that, despite her young age, she was already capable of taking control of the direction of her own life. There were not many people she could tell about the transfer, which made her all the more eager for Fang Chang’an to arrive so that she could show off a little.

While waiting, she several times felt like calling him directly to tell him, but ultimately decided that doing so would seem too forward—as though she were overly fond of boasting and especially proud of the whole affair. And so she restrained herself and waited.

The girl tried her best to recount what she knew in an indifferent tone, but her eager desire to show off was constantly betrayed by her words and expressions. Cheng Mengfei watched from the side and secretly found it amusing.

Fang Chang’an, however, played along perfectly. Through his words, expressions, and tone, he conveyed his feelings with just the right degree of emphasis: the surprise and reluctance he had felt upon first learning that she would transfer; the admiration and astonishment he showed when he heard how logically and forcefully she had argued with her parents; and the nervous anticipation he displayed upon hearing that her parents were hesitating and discussing the matter.

When he learned that she had ultimately won her parents over through her determination and excellent performance, he merely nodded lightly and let out an almost imperceptible sigh of relief. Even so, his restrained relief and delight, along with the reluctance and melancholy he felt upon learning that she would still be leaving after the summer, were plain enough to sense.

Shen Mo had been quite excited at first, but seeing him like that and remembering that they would be separated after the summer vacation, she grew somewhat downcast as well.

Seeing that neither of them was speaking, Cheng Mengfei was about to comfort them when Fang Chang’an smiled and said, “This is a good thing. Once you’re at the city’s No. 1 High School, your grades will definitely improve. You’ll attend high school there too, and by then I’ll get into the city’s No. 1 High School as well.”

Shen Mo’s eyes lit up, and she became cheerful again. She nodded vigorously. “Mm-hmm.”

That was exactly what she had been thinking.

Fang Chang’an met her gaze, and the two of them broke into smiles at the same moment. He had expected her to grow shy, but beneath the gaze of those clear, sparkling eyes, it was he who looked away first.

“Well, Teacher Cheng, I’ll go upstairs and put the books back.”

Cheng Mengfei nodded. Fang Chang’an turned to Shen Mo, and the girl rose to her feet.

“I’ll go too.”

Cheng Mengfei nodded again, picked up the remote, and switched on the television.

“Go ahead. I’ll watch some television.”

The two of them went upstairs one after the other. Once they reached the familiar study, Fang Chang’an put away his books, then took out a copy of *Reminiscences of Tao’an* and flipped through it casually. When he turned around and saw Shen Mo still staring at him, he gave her an questioning look.

The girl pouted slightly.

“Fang Chang’an, if we meet again in high school, will you still recognize me?”

He laughed.

“You’ll still be Shen Mo in high school. It’ll be enough if you don’t fail to recognize me.”

Shen Mo also felt that her question had been rather silly. Imagining the scene of their meeting again in high school, she grew expectant and happy once more. She smiled sweetly and declared with absolute confidence, “I’ll definitely recognize you.”

“That’s good.”

*Reminiscences of Tao’an* had been written by Zhang Dai. In his later life, Fang Chang’an had read an online novel called *Elegant and Saucy*, and its portrayal of Zhang Dai had left a deep impression on him. He therefore brought the book to the desk and sat down to read.

As usual, Shen Mo found a copy of *The Poems of Wang Wei* and sat beside him. After a while, she asked softly, “This whole book is written in classical language. Can you understand it?”

“I can understand some of it. There are parts I can’t.”

“Oh.”

After a moment, the girl asked again, “What is this book about?”

“The Tower of Repaying Kindness. It describes a tower built during the reign of the Ming emperor Zhu Di. It was made of glazed bricks, and there were hundreds or even thousands of Buddhist statues inside. Every statue was assembled from glazed bricks, and every brick had its own number. Whenever one was damaged, the Ministry of Works would immediately fire a replacement according to the number and put it back in place. It was almost as if the golden body of the Buddha could repair itself.”

Fang Chang’an gave her a brief account of the story of *The Tower of Repaying Kindness*. Then, as if he had suddenly thought of something, he asked, “Are you living in the city with your parents now?”

“I only stayed there for a few days. Now that school has started, I still have to live with Grandma and Grandpa. Besides, my parents have to travel for business.”

Fang Chang’an nodded, then asked, “Where is your home? I mean, your home in the city.”

Shen Mo blinked at him in confusion.

“Why are you asking?”

“I’m just asking in advance. When high school starts, I’ll secretly wait for you outside your house and give you a surprise.”

As he spoke, Fang Chang’an casually closed his book.

Shen Mo giggled. Perhaps she had imagined the scene he described and found it amusing—or perhaps simply pleasing. She said, “You just want to scare me, don’t you? I’ll definitely notice you beforehand.”

Fang Chang’an smiled.

“Not necessarily.”

“I definitely will.” The girl looked utterly confident.

“All right, then. But even if you do notice me, you’d better not show it. You’ll have to pretend to be surprised, or I’ll be so disappointed. Right?”

“Mm…”

Shen Mo tilted her head toward him, shallow dimples appearing in her cheeks as she smiled sweetly.

“All right. I’ll definitely make it look convincing.”

…

Fang Chang’an did not read any more. Shen Mo seemed to have forgotten about reading as well. The two of them talked about everything from the winter vacation to their meeting in high school.

During that time, Shen Chengyan returned, carrying a faint smell of alcohol. He came into the study and chatted for a while before leaving again.

As usual, Fang Chang’an stayed for dinner. A little after five, it was already dark outside, and snow was still falling. Cheng Mengfei glanced outdoors and said, “Chang’an, don’t ride your bicycle back to school today. Don’t you still need to go to your uncle’s place to pick up your bedding? Let Uncle Shen take you there. You can come back for the bicycle when you have time.”

Fang Chang’an hesitated briefly, then smiled.

“Then I’ll trouble you, Uncle Shen.”

“Why are you still being so polite with me?”

Shen Chengyan laughed and scolded him lightly, then asked Shen Mo, “Mo Mo, are you going over with us now, or will you go later with your aunt?”

Shen Mo hesitated as well.

“I’ll go with Fang Chang’an.”

“All right. I’ll take you home first to get your things.”

Shen Chengyan drove the two children to his father’s house first, where they picked up the schoolbags. Then, following Fang Chang’an’s directions, he drove to Fang Luguo’s home.

Fang Luguo lived in one of several small courtyards inside a large compound. The shared space was extremely limited, and cars could not enter. Afraid of causing unnecessary inconvenience with excessive formalities, Shen Chengyan parked by the roadside and let Fang Chang’an go over alone.

Fang Luguo’s family was just preparing to eat. When they saw Fang Chang’an arrive, they hurriedly invited him to join them and return to school afterward. Fang Chang’an therefore explained that he had already eaten.

Fang Luguo and Xu Jing knew that he was close to Cheng Mengfei and her husband, but even so, they were inevitably surprised to hear that he had just eaten at Cheng Mengfei’s home while Shen Chengyan waited outside in his car.

Xu Jing said, “Luguo, help Chang’an carry it over. It’s snowing, and you should at least go say hello, so they won’t think our family lacks manners.”

Fang Luguo understood what his wife meant: she wanted him to take the opportunity to greet Shen Chengyan and establish at least a little connection. He disliked such behavior, but the two thick quilts and one mattress had originally been wrapped together in a bedsheet for convenience, making them rather awkward to carry. He was also worried that Fang Chang’an would not manage them alone, so he went upstairs, brought them down, and carried them outside for him.

Fang Chang’an said goodbye to his aunt and cousin. Holding up a large black umbrella over his uncle, he walked with him to the roadside.

For the sake of giving directions, Fang Chang’an had been sitting in the front passenger seat. But when Shen Chengyan saw the large bundle of bedding, he estimated that putting it in the back seat would take up Shen Mo’s space. He therefore helped place it in the front, leaving Fang Chang’an to sit beside Shen Mo in the back.

Fang Luguo had never been good with words. After thanking Shen Chengyan and making the customary invitation—“Why don’t you come inside for a while?”—he had nothing more to say. Shen Chengyan politely declined and did not linger. He drove into the school grounds, stopped outside the residential area, and helped Fang Chang’an carry the bedding to the dormitory.

Shen Chengyan had visited the cafeteria before, but this was his first time entering the dormitory. When they went in, Wang Hao had already made half the bed. Since both boys had brought mattresses, the two had to be laid one atop the other. The sheet had not yet been spread and lay with the quilts.

Even so, the arrangement clearly belonged to someone. Shen Chengyan looked around the dormitory and, seeing no empty beds, asked in bewilderment, “Which bed do you sleep in?”

Once Fang Chang’an pointed out Wang Hao’s bed, Shen Chengyan understood that the two boys were sharing it. He looked at the size of the bed. Even for two children, turning over would probably be difficult. For a moment, he did not know what to say.

Fang Chang’an understood his feelings. There was no need to make the bed yet; he could do it after evening study ended. He left with Shen Chengyan. When he had come from home, he had forgotten to bring an umbrella. The large black umbrella had been given to him by Cheng Mengfei for temporary use.

Shen Chengyan held the umbrella as Fang Chang’an followed him out of the dormitory. Looking up, Fang Chang’an said with a smile, “Uncle Shen, you aren’t thinking of building dormitories for the school again, are you?”

Before Shen Chengyan could answer, he continued with a laugh, “By the time we’re in the eighth grade, everyone will have a bed of their own. Besides, none of us is very tall yet, so squeezing together is no big deal. When the Chairman first arrived in the capital, several people slept on one large platform bed, and anyone who wanted to turn over had to greet the person beside him first. I’m merely following their example and experiencing the hardships of life.”

Shen Chengyan patted him on the head, smiled, and sighed.

“You’ve got quite a spirit. All right, you’re not an ordinary child, so I won’t say any more. Sigh… when all is said and done, the country is simply too poor.”

Fang Chang’an smiled.

“It will grow wealthy. The tides of history ebb and flow. What comes together after a long separation will eventually divide, and what remains divided after a long time will eventually reunite. Since the time of the First Emperor of Qin, this land has been divided and reunited again and again. It has fallen into decline more than once, but whenever it comes together again, it soon becomes powerful once more. And now we are living in a new age unlike any that came before. China’s rise is only a matter of time—and that time is already very near.”

Shen Chengyan sighed but did not reply.

After so much contact, Shen Chengyan had come to understand Fang Chang’an’s intelligence and precociousness deeply. But he was still only a child, and he did not understand the difficulties of the current era. In the past, China had managed to grow powerful again and again because even during periods of relative decline, it had always maintained an advantage in productivity and civilization.

The predicament China faced now, however, was not merely the trauma left by a century of turmoil. It was also that, in many fields of which the nation had once been proud, China now found itself at a disadvantage. Moreover, the modern world was bound together more closely than ever before. How easy could it be for China to rise again as it had in the past?

The more clearly one saw the situation, the less confidence one felt about the future.

Fang Chang’an naturally understood what Shen Chengyan was truly thinking. Once they returned to the car, Shen Chengyan drove to the teaching building. Just as Fang Chang’an was about to get out, he asked, “Uncle Shen, were you just thinking that the world today is different from the world of the past?”

Before Shen Chengyan could answer, he continued innocently, “But China today is different from the China of the past too. In the past, scholars stood above everyone else. Now everyone can study.”

“You must have heard the saying, ‘Study for the rise of China.’”

As he spoke, Fang Chang’an and Shen Mo both got out of the car. He held the large black umbrella beside the window, tilting it slightly toward Shen Mo. The girl stood shoulder to shoulder with him, unaware of the small gesture. She merely listened with wide, sparkling eyes, full of curiosity.

Through the lowered window on the passenger side, Shen Chengyan looked at the small boy who had astonished him so many times. He watched as Fang Chang’an smiled with childlike innocence and spoke words that sounded equally childlike.

“People like us study for ourselves. We may never have considered why we study, and we may lack lofty ideals and ambitions. But once we enter school, once we learn to read and write, we are already studying for China’s revival.”

“When we grow up, China will have grown powerful again. It will be the time of China’s revival.”

“Just wait and see.”